But it was never meant to be so I just make the best of my situation, which these days to me, being as self reliant as I can, travelling everywhere independently so that I can go and stay with family friends - for instance I've just been to Leicester to see my godmother for a couple of days. The family will help out as much as they can to get me to the train station or a friends house if they are going that way but if not then I will make other arrangements.
And I love travelling overseas. So far I have been to New Zealand and Sydney on my own but there are lots more places to see....as they say, the world is your oyster.....
So this is me, I'm positive, I'm happy. I don't let this blasted thing, this thing where brain cells clash and starting fighting as if they have octopus tentacles. No I don't let it get in the way. I get up in the morning and never think 'oh I can't do anything today because I'm going to have a fit.' If I did that I wouldn't be able to do anything. People have asked me in the past 'are you ok to go out today?' My reply 'Of course.' I don't think about it, apart from the fact that I carry the necassary drugs around if needed.
Only I have realised recently that I have a 'Freaky Friday' of my own to contend with. I have good weeks, when I don't have any seizures (those are blessings!), or just have simple partial seizures which are so minor that I've found the strength of mind to ignore them. Then I have the really bad weeks, where lots of other things go on apart from the seizures that I end up being sedated up to hilt every day......but this isn't about them.
So you're probrably thinking that I'm going a bit mad by now. Freaky Friday, what's she going on about? Well, Friday is the last day of the week right? And if my brain's behaved, I've had a week of being busy, not thinking about head traumas, even if sometimes they might be there. And then suddenly I'll wake up on Friday and Bang! I'll have an ice, there'll be tingles or a migraine or tension headache.....the list goes on but often by lunchtime I'll be really frustated because it's stopped me dead in my tracks. It's almost as if my brain has had a complete shutdown, just like a computer. And they often say that don't they? That your brain works like a computer. So just like a computer that has been working all day and is screaming 'I'm over-heating!' my brain screams 'I've had enough! I can't work anymore!
So there it is, my Freaky Friday. Often it makes me cry with frustration, but usually I try and get through it by dancing and laughing.....it's the best medicine.
